My Cure For Insomnia

I will cure my insomnia by telling boring stories of my life as of late. I mean, I just went to google something, and in the google box it automatically filled in "calcified fetus". Um, yeah, I really would like to know what that is. But more than that I want to see the pictures. So I clicked on the little "image" box and... BEHOLD... a calcified fetus. It was so, so... what's the word... engrossing. I think I stared at it for like five minutes, before continuing to search for more calcified fetus'. This woman had one for THREE years. She's like "Yeah, I got pregnant three years ago or so, but the baby never came out." Hmm.... wonder where it went? Did it just fall out and walk away, all fetus-y, "Peace out mom, thanks for the free rent!" No! No! This did not happen. The thing turned to stone and she waited THREE WHOLE LONG NASTY CALCIFIED YEARS! It's aweful to me. And it probably smelled bad. I am not doing well with smells. This whole nausea thing has got to stop sometime. Because now I start to imagine how bad something smells and how bad it could make me sick. Like check out tonsil stones. They too are aweful, and they're caused by some sulfur producing bacteria (or something like that) that along with craters in your tonsils and food particles, they get trapped. I find it wretched because I get them! Sulfur is horrible smelling! So I made an appointment to get my tonsils out because I've had this nausea thing for a good solid 7 months, and I can't deal with those nasty little things. Which, by the way, aren't always little. I pray that the ENT man will say "Yes April, we will remove yet another part of your body." I think I'm going to google that. See what it looks like during surgery. I've got to imagine you'd have the world's worst sore throat... and I am sick of pain.... hmmmm... pain, or sulfur death? Pain. I can handle pain. You could walk right up to me, punch me square in the forehead, and I would look back at you and say "Good day to you sir". And it wouldn't faze me. Or it might. The other reaction could go a little something like "AOOOWWWWWWW!!" followed by tears and moaning. And then anger. And then revenge. But not revenge, cuz Jesus said love your neighbor. So I would say to my neighbor that just punched me, "I love you. But I do not like you."
I believe that was quite a rant, enough to put me to bed like a baby.